Spreadsheets to Bedsheets

The office was always quiet first thing in the morning. Even more so on a Friday. It was the most productive time of day as far as Jon was concerned. The repetitive grind of work was filled with pointless questions about tasks that seemed inherently mundane.
However this particular Friday proposed being a little different. There was a big meeting today and the heat was most definitely on.
Jon arrived at the main door to the sizeable office where he seemed to spend most of his waking life.
"What's up, Phil?"
Jon waved a soldier's salute at the security guard who gazed vacantly at a small black and white security monitor.
"Different day, same shit!" came the tired reply from the fifty-something guard.
"I hear you, man!" Jon sympathized.
"Only five hours to lunch though dude!" he offered in consolation.
"Way ahead of you, brother!"
Phil reached to his right side and held a half eaten bacon sandwich aloft with a sense of smug satisfaction.
Jon broke into a smile as he passed through the security barrier. He touched his ID card on the reader and barely noticed the picture on the identity badge that showed a man 6 years younger and 10 pounds lighter.
Jon reached the elevator in less than a minute. Without thinking he entered and hit level four. Shortly after the doors glided shut.
A few moments later the doors opened to reveal a large open plan office space. It was unremarkable in every way. Computer screens, desk phones, cupboards. It looked like any of the millions of offices around the world. But this one was currently empty. The clock on the wall read 7.04am. It would be at least an hour before his colleagues began to arrive.
His morning routine was optimised to get him ready to work in the shortest time possible. First, he hit the button on his PC. There was no noise as the black box fired up. The display screen activated automatically so he knew it was doing it's thing.
He threw his black jacket on the coat stand and headed to the kitchenette. He grabbed his coffee mug that carried a picture of the A-Team van on side and a picture of George Peppard's Hannibal Smith, complete with smile and cigar on the other. The words round the lip of the cup read, inevitably, 'I love it when a plan comes together!'
The coffee and sugar went in and the hot water boiler turned the dried powder into a dark brown liquid. He pondered exploring the fridge for milk but he hated the task of finding some suitable for consumption, so left it black.
He ambled back to his desk and sat down. The computer screen waited patiently for his credentials and password. Within moments he was back to where he left off some 9 hours ago.
"Bullshit!" Jon exclaimed.
"Oh, having a good morning?" came a female voice in reply.
Jon had been so engrossed with his spreadsheet that he hadn't noticed a few people had arrived. The sun was starting to raise its head properly and he knew his quiet time was over.
"It's this fucking formula!" he said desperately.
"I've been here since 7am and I can't get the damned thing working!"
"Lucky the professionals have arrived then!" giggled Alana.
Alana was about 30. Ten years younger than Jon. They had been working together for about two years and their childish sense of humour had developed a friendship that made the job bearable.
Alana had a mind and face that were both still fresh and Jon was relieved she was now there. She dressed in office wear and looked like someone committed to her job.
"Take a look will you, kid!" he asked expectantly.
"I'll get you a drink."
Alana sat next to Jon most days. She often wondered how on Earth he survived at work or in life generally but she was equally happy to see him. They had worked together, closely, for so long now they allowed a degree of banter and innuendo between them.
She pulled up a chair and stared at the screen, trying to unlock the problem. After a few moments Jon returned with a herbal tea.
"Left the bag in. Watch out it's still hot." Jon informed her.
"Oh thanks!" The technician replied.
She reached instinctively to the handle and took it, sliding the white cup near to her.
Jon paced annoyingly behind her. He knew she would have it fixed in a few minutes but with a board meeting fifteen minutes away he was understandably anxious.
"Will you fucking sit down and stay still!" she demanded.
"Sorry, Als!" came the meek reply.
Despite being junior to him in rank and age, she carried a strong presence that belied her 5'1" stature. The curly red hair, that right now was pulled back into a neat bun carried a 'don't fuck with me' warning akin to a rattlesnake. Yet at the same time her auburn locks offset her pale skin and blue eyes that represented a natural beauty with some distant Celtic connection.
She was wearing a smart, short dress over a pair of dark work trousers. It told others she was a professional but still young enough to want to have a fun with her clothing. kastamonu escort The black glasses on her face gave her a slightly studious look. Whilst this was part of her character, Alana still liked to party. Hard.
"Got it!" she screamed rather too excitedly for 8.15am.
Some of the slack-jawed early birds turned round, conveying displeasure and a need for quiet that permeated most jobs in IT.
"Your look-up was wrong!" Alana informed him.
"You're a genius, Als!"
Jon beamed as he took a slug of coffee, grabbed his laptop and ran off towards the board room.
"You owe me lunch!" she shouted after him.
"It's on me!" Jon shouted back without turning round.
Alana smiled to herself and took up her own desk. Jon was the most disorganised fool she'd ever met but they had looked after each other since the day she started with the company. She had his back and she knew that he had hers.
As she swivelled her chair into position in front of her own desk she noticed Jane scowling at her. Jane was in her late fifties but her greying hair and under-invested wardrobe made her seem older.
"Why do you keep saving him?" Jane moaned, her black eyes peering over her reading glasses.
"He's not worth it!" she went on.
"Oh piss off, Jane!" Alana retorted as she fired up her own computer terminal.
"Well, really!?" Jane stammered.
Don't you fucking start Alana thought to herself.
Whilst age and experience usually commanded a degree of respect from younger staff, Jane was wise enough to know that, in this mood, to press some more buttons would be a bad move. She chose to return to her database and keep quiet. This time.
When Jon returned to their corner of the office Alana was starting to feel hungry. She had skipped breakfast this morning, having overslept slightly and cups of tea only went so far to quell her appetite.
"How'd it go?" Alana enquired.
"Fucking awesome, Als! They bought it. We're in!"
Jon could see Jane's eyes glance over, listening. He hated her sticking her fucking nose in all the time but on this occasion he let it slide.
"They want us to do the analysis!" Jon beamed.
"That's amazing!" congratulated Alana.
She rose from her chair and hugged him. They both enjoyed the moment. Eight months of hard work had finally paid off and it was right to celebrate.
They simultaneously realised the strange feeling of the embrace and the fact they were in the office. If walls had ears, then Jane had the biggest mouth on the east coast. They quickly released each other.
"Get your coat, we're having a proper lunch!" Jon ordered.
"Thought you'd never ask!" said Alana thankfully.
She was happy but starving.
Ten minutes later they were in a steakhouse for professionals. Clean, mildly decadent and designed to extract at least 70 dollars from each diner for lunch. Jon and Alana were both happy with a cheeseburger and fries from any roadside restaurant but this wasn't any regular day. The bottle of overpriced Chianti that stood proudly between them was already half empty. The bread rolls that 3 minutes ago were offered serenely by the waiter, had been reduced to crumbs.
Today had been a big day. Success in the boardroom meant they were now the regional lead team for the project. Blowing it hadn't been an option.
Alana knew that Jon was a liability in most senses but working a room was definitely one of his assets.
The stress, fuelled by some warming alcohol, was now bleeding away.
"It'll be fillet and Remy every week, Als!" Jon suggested playfully.
"Steady on, Jon. Maybe every fortnight!" she conceded.
At that moment the waiter in his crisp white shirt with mandatory black tie returned.
"Your New York, Miss. Medium rare." He said as he set the large plate in front of Alana.
"Your fillet, Sir. Rare."
Charles the waiter, as his name badge decried, then returned in flash with a jug of béarnaise sauce and set it down.
"Got any ketchup?" Alana asked in all innocence.
Charles huffed, knowing that if such a sauce was required to embellish French fries, it was mayonnaise that was permissible. Just.
"Can't take you anywhere, can I!" teased Jon.
"Ketchup and fries. I don't friggin' care where we are!" came the fiery reply.
"Lol!" they both murmured quietly as Charles returned with a saucer of ketchup and placed it next to Alana's plate then moved away, his eyes avoiding theirs, disapprovingly.
The next hour flew by as they chatted and laughed as they ate their meal. They both felt good and were reluctant to head back to the office. Not least from the effects of the rich food and strong wine.
"Wherever have you been?" scalded Jane.
"Out, Jane." snapped Jon, empowered by the booze in his veins.
"Something you should try, Jane. There's a whole world outside your window, you know."
You cunt, he didn't say.
When Jon was in a good mood, he was flying. kayseri escort Nothing could phase him and Jane retreated again.
"Good work, guys!" came a calm and deep voice.
"Thanks Ted. Great news travels fast I see!" replied Jon.
"It certainly does!" Ted was smiling.
The experienced vice-president was always smiling when a deal was done but he was genuinely pleased for the pair of them. A father figure for Alana and a mentor for Jon, he cared about them and wanted them to succeed.
"Get out of here, guys" ordered Ted.
"Take her out Jon, enjoy yourself!"
Ted pushed a bundle of bank notes into his hand. The two hundred bucks was peanuts compared to the profit on the deal that had just been signed.
"No more work today, that's an order!"
Jon glanced over to Alana and he saw immediately her eyes glance downwards to the floor. The smile on his face vanished.
"You've got a date haven't you" Jon asked.
"Afraid so. And I would have come, Jon, I promise."
She was apologetic in her tone and demeanour. She really did want to hit the bars to celebrate but her online date with Simon was today and he seemed an okay guy.
"I'm going straight after work".
"Erm, sure. That's fine. Maybe next week?" said Jon, failing to hide his disappointment.
Jane smiled to herself. Karma, she thought.
The mood was killed and everyone returned to their screens and gazed at numbers and code in silence.
At five o'clock Alana got up and retrieved her bag from her locker.
"I'm getting changed now, Jon. Will you shut down for me?" Alana had broken the silence.
"Erm, yeah sure." came the terse reply.
He hadn't done any work for the last two hours. He was looking forward to taking Alana out for six months but the opportunity never arose. He hadn't thought of them together but there was no doubt he liked her. Funny, smart, cute and a bit crazy. It was his favourite combination in a woman.
"Erm, see you next week?" Alana said conciliatorily.
Jon turned and was instantly shocked. The smart analyst had been replaced by a fire cracker. Alana's hair, freed from the confines of office mode, exploded from the top of her head.
The black dress she was wearing highlighted curves in the most subtle, yet spine tingling way. The flat sensible shoes were gone and a pair of red 3 inch heels took centre stage.
Jon felt his senses turn up a notch and the hairs on the back of his neck stood to attention. He knew she was cute, even when she was banging a keyboard but now she looked beautiful.
For a moment, which seemed like forever, he tried to think of what to say. 'Wow' seemed the obvious choice. Too uncouth, he decided. 'You look amazing!' Too full on he considered.
"That's one lucky guy, Als!" he offered politely.
Not enough to make a big deal of the situation but acknowledging the transformation before him.
"Thanks, Jon. We'll see." his friend replied.
She was more emotionally mature than him despite her age; she was a woman after all and was far more in tune with life and emotions than he was. She had loved, she had been hurt, she had played, she had enjoyed solitude, all in her 30 years. So she knew it was usually a good idea to take one's time to find a lover, partner or friend.
"I got to go, Jon. Thanks for today, its been amazing." Alana told him.
She motioned towards him and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. As her lips gently touched his skin. He closed his eyes for a brief instant and at the same time caught a strong air of her perfume. He had no idea what it was, but he could tell it was expensive.
"I'll see you next week, Als. I'm gonna head out for a few beers, maybe take a walk. Have a great time."
He nudged her gently and playfully on the shoulder. He wanted to run but it was a good way to diffuse the tension in the air.
"Thanks Jon. I really wish I could..."
He cut her off.
"Get out of here already, will ya."
She smiled and picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder and shortly after she folded her coat over her left arm and began to head to the elevator.
She felt Jon's hand pass her something. She felt some paper in her palm. She looked and opened her hand and in it was a fifty dollar note. One of the ones that Ted had given to Jon earlier.
"Have a couple on me. Well on Ted, actually!" said Jon kindly.
Alana really laughed this time.
"Don't spend any of it on lover boy!" he ordered.
"I won't!" she agreed and with that she headed off to meet her date.
Jon was sad to see her leave. He wasn't sure if it was the momentous win from earlier or seeing his friend looking so stunning but he wished he was meeting her on a date. He would have treated her right, he thought to himself.
"You can forget about her, Jon. She far too young for you." came an older voice from behind him.
"Oh fuck off, Jane!" he snapped and in an instant he grabbed his rucksack kıbrıs escort and jacket and headed towards the stairwell.
"What about your computer, Jon? Who's going to turn it off?" enquired Jane after him.
"Maybe you can bore it to sleep" replied Jon.
With that he smashed through the door to the stairs. He needed to get outside.
The bar Jon had found was playing 80s rock. In front of him on the bar top were two empty shot glasses and a half empty glass of beer.
A foursome of guys and girls were playing pool in the corner of the place. Most of the tables were full of office workers, most of whom would be king
gone before the kids arrived.
He was picking at some peanuts.
"Tough day, buddy?" asked the sympathetic barman.
"Not really." said Jon, not feeling like the small talk therapy that seemed to be on offer.
The young barman took the hint and chose to busy himself rearranging some bottles on the neon illuminated shelving.
A couple of beers later, Jon was over the disappointment of Alana's date. He was talking to a middle aged couple about all sort of shit when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He reached for his cell phone and the display told him it was Alana calling. He moved quickly to the exit. The music was far too loud to take a call. He swiped the answer bar just in time.
"Hi Jon! It's Alana."
He was grateful for the heads up from his thousand dollar smart phone but he recognised her voice instantly.
"Yo, Alana!" he said merrily. "What's up?"
"Fucker never showed!" she told him tersely.
"Well hey, why don't you come over here. I'm at Frankies. They've got beer and Bon Jovi!"
Jon knew it was a shit offer but it was all the game he had after 4 beers and two tequilas.
"I thought you'd never ask!" she said.
"I'll be there in ten."
She hung up.
"Hey man, where've you been?" asked the new bar friends Jon had been talking to.
Alex and Dave were the names. The couple were from small town Florida and just in the city for a few days he had managed to establish.
"Erm, phone call." he replied.
"My friend Alana is coming, she's a bit upset. I'm just gonna get a booth. She needs to talk."
Jon explained the events of the day as quickly as he could to Alex and Dave.
"Hey, man no problem. Good to speak with you." said Dave.
Jon caught the eye of the young bar steward and without talking he gestured for him to reload Alex and Dave's drinks. He took a twenty from his wallet and held it up in the air so, Gary, the barman could see the payment. Gary acknowledged with a nod and Jon set the bank note on the bar and collected his belongings, his bottle of beer and moved quickly to secure a booth.
The ten minutes had felt like fifty but eventually Alana arrived. She was wearing her coat as she entered through the door. She stopped just inside the entrance and scanned the place for Jon. At 6'4 with glasses he wasn't usually hard to spot but the place was busy and sizeable.
"You Alana?" came a guys voice.
"Er, yeah?" she replied cautiously.
"He's over there, in the third booth!"
Dave had correctly guessed this was Jon's friend and directed Alana to where Jon was waiting. She stared back quizzically. Who was this guy and how did she know her name she wondered.
"Jon!" Dave explained.
"Your buddy, he's sitting over there!"
Typical Jon, Alana smiled internally. Already been talking to half the people in the place probably she thought.
"Thanks!" replied Alana and she walked over to the booth area.
She found the right one and slid in directly opposite Jon.
"Fucking asshole! He never showed." Alana told him, freeing herself from her long work coat.
"Some people are crazy, Als!" he offered in consolation.
Alana stopped a passing waitress.
"Vodka and lemonade. Large" she demanded.
"Another, sir?" the young woman asked Jon, looking at his half empty bottle. He nodded and she left keying the order into the PDA.
"One whole hour I waited for that dick." Alana explained.
It was one of the risks of online dating, Jon thought as he listened to his friend.
"He texted me to say something had come up and could we take a rain check!?" she went on.
"Probably, some shit came up?" Jon said.
"Probably some 5'9" blonde shit came up!" Alana replied, taking a large mouthful of her drink.
"Well you've always got me!" Jon said. He blew her an exaggerated kiss and held the pose in faux-expectation.
"You dick!" she smiled.
"Come on let's get drunk!"
She downed the last of her vodka and immediately sought out that waitress for another.
A few hours later the alcohol had taken full control of both Jon and Alana's inhibition chip. They were laughing and joking like friends who'd known each other for far longer than they really had.
They were now sitting on the same side of the booth. It was 10pm and the place was rammed. The young couple opposite them were so engrossed in their smart phones, they didn't bother them.
"What's the matter with me Jon? Why can't I find a decent guy?" she pondered out loud.
"Maybe it's because you like that folk music shit?" Jon said. "That'd put me off!"
"I'm serious, you idiot!" she raged.
"I'm sorry!" replied Jon.